When the clock turned to midnight on December 31, 2019 I never imagined – none of us ever imagined, what this year would really bring.
I have always been an optimistic person and I was incredibly optimistic at the start of this year. Right away, I made plans for the year ahead. I put together a list of places I wanted to travel to, I bought tickets to concerts and festivals I wanted to attend, and I listed in my bullet journal professional accomplishments that I hoped to achieve.
In February of this year it became clear to me that this year would be like no other before it. Then, by the end of March I was experiencing lockdown in London and working from home along with billions of other people around the world.
This year has been many things for me, so as we come to the last month of the strangest year of our lifetimes (so far), I wanted to share (in no particular order) 20 things I’ve learned so far in 2020.
1. True Friends Are Pandemic-Proof
I’ve lived in four different countries in the last 10 years and in each of these countries I’ve made many friends. Some were temporary friends, whose lives I enjoy following through social media, while others are friends that I know I can reach out to, no matter what and who no matter how much time apart we have spent apart, we can always pick up right where we left off. In 2020 I have learned that true friendships don’t need constant outings, or nights out. What they need, is two people that are committed to supporting one another- whether it’s through texts, calls or dm’s, true friendships will find a way.
2. Happiness is More Important Than a Job
This was a lesson that I learned the hard way. For such a long time, my life revolved around work. I bought into the “work hard, play hard” and “hustle” mentality. I was so busy working that I didn’t notice how unhappy my job was making me. Then, when the unhappiness set in, I knew that I had to do whatever was necessary to take my life back. For me, this meant turning down a contract extension and being unemployed in a foreign country. Yes, it was terrifying and yes, I became unemployed at one of the worst times ever to be unemployed. However, I know that a job that was making me miserable, would have only become unbearable during a pandemic.
3. What Other People Think About You is None of Your Business
Leaving my job set off a chain-reaction of judgement and at first, it was hard to bear the judgement of others as I was just trying to do what was best for myself. Then, I remembered one of my favorite quotes, “What other people think about you is none of your business,” and I slowly started to live this way. Nobody knows exactly what I went through at my former job, and therefore nobody should be allowed to judge a decision I made for my own good.
4. It’s Important to Have More Than One Source of Income
Four year ago, I had two jobs and worked up to 60 hours a week. My life completely revolved around work and I don’t even think I was living, I was simply surviving through that time. After leaving my job, I realized that I needed to have another source of income and thanks to TikTok and YouTube videos, I’m slowly learning about what it means to have a passive income. I’ve started to learn how to invest in the stock market (which is a lot less scary than I thought) and I have looked for other ways to make money. I’ve recently started using Poshmark as well, but more on that in the next point.
5. I Have Way Too Many Things
For my undergraduate thesis, I wrote about materialism and how we’ve unconsciously let it rule our lives. I thought I was pretty good about being conscious of how I spent my money, until I spent about a month decluttering. First, I went through my closet in London and then I did the same with my closet in California. Inspired by Marie Kondo’s decluttering method, I slowly started to go through my clothes, makeup, shoes, bags and I definitely know that my shopping habit has gotten out of hand. Through Poshmark, I’m learning how I can make a little money while finding a new home for the items that I no longer need.
6. Spending vs Investing Money
If I had invested $500 – $1000 in Apple stock each time I bought an iPhone, I would be in much different financial situation than I am today. However, after decluttering my closets I’ve been extra conscious of how my money is being spent. Whenever I buy something now, first I put it into an online shopping cart and leave it there for a couple of days. Then, I make sure I am either replacing something I already have or that it’s something that I will use in more than one scenario. If after two or three days I can still justify how I’m spending my money, then I will shop and feel happy, not guilty.
7. How to Grieve
Learning how to grieve was not a lesson I was ready for. This year I lost two grandparents and due to the pandemic I was unable to be there for them during their final days. I have never experienced loss like this, and I had limited experience grieving before 2020. Losing my grandparents and being unable to be close to family was the hardest thing I experienced this year. If it wasn’t for my support system, I don’t think I would have made it out of the deep hole of sadness that I fell into. I still have days when all I want to do is cry, but I know that people I love are willing to be there for me and that makes all the difference in the world.
8. Have a Support System and Cherish It
I naively didn’t realize that I had a support system, until I needed it. During my times of grief it was so hard for me to reach out for help, but once I did, it made everything better. My other half, my family, my friends, they all supported me when I needed it the most, and I will never take any of them for granted. It was through their love and understanding that I was able to smile again after having cried for so long.
9. Never Take Family for Granted
I always thought I was just fine living in London away from my family. Home for me always felt only a “short” 10-11 hour plane ride away. Then, Covid-19, the pandemic and multiple lockdowns happened and it became impossible for me to come home for many months. At the beginning of the year I had planned to spend a week during Easter and the entire month of August with my family. One by one my flights home were cancelled again, and again, and again. After 5 cancelled flights in 7 months I was finally able to make it home, and I will never again take being home with my family for granted.
10. How to Fly Across the World During a Pandemic
In March, when the world started going into lockdown, I briefly considered changing my Easter flight and coming home. Then, as I watched millions of people rushing to make it home in absolutely packed transatlantic flights, I soon realized that this definitely was not the best thing for me to do. Although I often wanted to go home, having waited as long as I did to come home, I’m confident that I was able to do it as safely as possible.
I absolutely will never again take flying for fun for granted, but this is something I will cover in 20 Things I’ve Learned So Far in 2020: Part 2.
Paulina’s Passport 